Thanks for the suggestion, Virt! I had a feeling that those are the glasses I'll end up using.
The Koopa Bros.: Back in Action
(The title of the short appears over an outside pan of the Koopa Bros. Fortress. Inside, we find Red pacing around and sighing in the bedroom of the Koopa Bros. Yellow is nearby soldering a motherboard at a table.)
Red: *sigh* Ugh… Another day of doing nothing…
(Yellow sets down his soldering tool and looks at Red.)
Yellow: What’s wrong, Red?
Red: You're the smart guy around here, Yellow. Figure it out yerself.
Black: *Offscreen* Save your brainpower, Yellow. He's just whining about how we haven't had a gig from Bowser in ages.
(Red gets startled by this comment as the camera quickly shifts to Black standing by the bed, next to him.)
Red: *Pants a bit* JEEZ, Black! You've been there long!? Stop usin' that freaky ninja stuff on me!
Black: “Freaky ninja stuff”? You mean like how we’re Ninjakoopas?
Red: *crosses arms* Pfft! Whatever!
Green: *Offscreen* Red! RED! *Barges in* What's wrong! What's wro- WHOA!
(Green trips on the floor and Red facepalms.)
Red: Still bein' a klutz as always, cheeseball?
Black: Don't pay any attention to that coward, Green. I snuck up on him in mid-rant and he screamed like a baby.
(Red glares at Black.)
Green: Oh? Was he rantin' about how we've been unemployed ever since Kammy lost her position next to Big B?
Red: *Facepalming* No… I was jabbin' about how us four ain't characters in Smash Bro- OF COURSE I WAS RANTIN' ABOUT THAT, SHELL-BRAIN! Ever since ol’ Blue Robes got back to being Bowser’s Player 2, replacing Kamms, the head honcho hasn’t let us do anything! Now we don’t got any goons or dough! And thanks to that, this fort’s falling apart!
(As Red is shouting at Green, Green is cowering behind Yellow. Yellow is worried and puts his hand over his mouth, while Black is standing there rolling his eyes with his arms crossed.)
Green: *After a moment, he composes himself by taking a deep breath* You didn't have to, like, blow your stack, dude. I was only askin'… Say, why's this place goin' south anyhow? Seems fine to me.
Red: Dude… all our traps are totally busted! Everyone keeps escaping from our jail for some reason, the firebars burnt out three years ago, the Bill Blasters were stolen, and the chains on the submersible stairs have rusted, so we can’t hide them underwater anymore! And speaking of our indoor pool: algae everywhere! It’s totally funky! I think we’ve got a monster living in there now, and I don’t want to find out what kind! I know ‘Stupor Mario’ and all those Bob-ombs messed up the place when they went after us, but we’ve been keeping up with our spring cleaning! So why’s our pad such a pigsty? Oh and let’s not forget the cherry on top! We’ve got some undead freak who keeps popping in and out of our fort like he’s our best friend neighbor or something! Who even is that guy? I keep telling him to get out, but he just laughs and says *bad accent* “What a story, Red.” How does he even know my name?
(As Red is explaining his dilemma, the camera cuts and pans around various parts of the fortress to illustrate each point. When he mentions the Dry Bones, it shows the bony creature collapsed on the floor; however, it shortly rearranges its pieces back together and lets out an eerie cackle. When Red is done explaining, the camera cuts back to the bedroom.)
Green: Aw, it's not so bad, Red! That thing in the water's totally nice, especially when you feed it pizza! Oh and, uh, I might’ve been lettin’ dudes outta jail.
(Red gives Green an annoyed look.)
Green: What? They said they’d behave themselves! And don’t make fun of Bill Bones, he might be shy, but he pays rent!
Black: Heh… From what Green is saying, we're better off making this place a cheap motel… Still, if it'll keep you from whining all the time, I'd say we try doing Bowser a favor.
Red: Get another job from King Firebreath? The guy hates our guts too much to even put us on KP duty just for minimum wage…
Green: But, Red, I thought King B just ain't interested in us no more since we're not much better than regular Troop-
Red: SHUT IT! The reason he’s had it out for us is ‘cuz that crimson creep creamed us! That’s all!
Yellow: Green is right, Red. No offense to you, but I recall the last time we met Bowser, and he clearly showed us signs of indifference, not hostility. Although now that I think of it, we were only hired at Kammy’s recommendation…
Red: Yeah, yeah, whatever. Look guys, the only way to earn back the big guy's trust is to mop the floor with that plumber, but good luck tryin' to take out the guy who even makes the king look bogus.
Green: Don't forget he even thrashed that baby Koopa dude who totally curb stomped us back at-
Red: CAN IT, GREEN!
Black: Wait, beating up a kid isn’t that impress-
Yellow: *changing the subject* May I make a suggestion, Red? Perhaps if we took an important person in Mario's life as a hostage, we could use them as a kind of bargaining chip to gain the upper-hand?
Red: And that's why you're the Einstein on our team, compadre! *Thinks for a bit* Now, Peach is out, since they likely beefed up security with all the times the bossman snatched her up.
Green: Actually, last time I heard, her place is still totally free from any-
Red: *Snaps fingers* BINGO! Remember Plumber Boy's gang of dweebs he kept during that Star Spirits fiasco? We nab one and we're GOLDEN!
Black: Red, none of those dudes are helpless. Three of them even helped beat us up! You're better off catching Luigi. He’s pretty easy to fool, just trick him into thinking he won another mansion or something, I dunno.
Yellow: I still can’t believe they fell for that.
Red: Can’t hear ya, too busy bein’ awesome! Get your K-Game on, bros, 'cuz we're headin' out to Goomba Village! As for you, Yellow, how about makin' yourself useful and get one of your… trap doohickies?
Yellow: Well actually I have this really brilliant one, and I'm just about to put the finishing touches. But I’ll just need a bit of help-
Red: Great, let’s go!
Yellow: Whoa!
(Red grabs Yellow's hand and drags him out of the bedroom. Green looks at Black, who sighs and preforms a single backflip out the window. Green looks frontwards toward the viewer and makes and shrugs before leaving.)
***
(The scene changes to Goomba Village. The camera is slowly panning outside of the main house to the left.)
Goombario: *From inside the house* Aw, come on, dad! Do I have to?
Goompapa: *Also inside* Son, even though it's yer job around the house to headbonk any unwanted guests, the last visitor we had was two months ago, and it was just an insurance salesman.
Goombario: You seemed to be so eager for me to headbonk such a nice guy.
Goompapa: Maybe he was nice to you, son! But we adults live in a different world! You’ll see! Anyways, yer ma's been pestering me to plant some new Goomnut Trees around the house. Since my back ain't what it used to be and I ain't gettin' my hands dirty over garden work, it's about time you started pulling yer weight around the house.
Goombario: Uh, when you say "hands," do you mean that figuratively?
Goompapa: …Less sass and more work, young man.
Goombario: Alright, I get it! I was just gonna start looking for the shovel! Yeesh!
(Goombario steps outside with a spade and heads over to a vacant patch of dirt. He starts digging in the ground with a Goomnut beside him. Shortly afterwards, the camera pans over to the entry gate with the Koopa Bros. close to it.)
Red: Heh! There's that fungal squirt! Playin' in the dirt right over there!
Green: Really? It looks like he's planting trees to make more *strikes a pose* radically tasty Goomnuts!
Random Goomba: Did you say Goomnuts?
Green: Why yes I did! Did you know that Goomnuts contain all the flavor of Super Mushrooms, but with only half the carbs?
Random Goomba: Tell me more!
Green: Well Goomnuts are best eaten with some Goomnut Helper and maybe a nice, cold Diet Chuckola Cola!
Random Goomba: And where can I get such food?
(Cut to a picture of some food.)
Green Voiceover: Why, only at Goomba’s Drive-In, now with our new Junior Goomnut Combo Meal! And new side salad options! “Goomba’s Drive-In, You’ll Love It, Or You’re Not A Goomba!”
(Cut back to Goomba Village.)
Red: GREEN! Stop doing commercials! … We only do those on weekends!
(Random Goomba leaves, while Red refocuses his attention to Goombario.)
Red: Bleh… I’ve always hated Goomnuts… Right, then. Yellow, brought the trapping whatchamacallit?
Yellow: Indeed, Red! *Pulls out a net launcher made of some discarded junk* It's not much, but it can launch a high tensile strength net up to exactly 114.6 meters away.
Red: A wha? I was hopin' it was just a cage or whatever, but okay. See, I ain't gonna need it since I'll just nab him the old fashioned way! Gimme a boost, Yellow!
Yellow: *As he helps Red up* Umm… Okay then… Not sure why I brought it along…
Red: Don’t need your ‘tude, dude!
Black: *under his breath* About time that windbag does something right for a change.
Green: What do ya mean, dude?
Black: He's taking the stealth approach, and I didn’t even have to tell him to. Sure, sneaking up on a Goomba isn't a big deal, but it’s a good start… Well, for Red, anyway…
Green: Oh! Sneak up and Goom-nap the little guy? That's, like, really clev-
Red: YO! CHESTNUT!
(Both Green and Yellow a struck dumbfounded, while Black facepalms.)
Black: Of course.
Red: *As he leans on top of the gate and rocks it back and forth* My hombres and I are back to punch your lights out! Without ol' Stromboli-Stache here to get you outta this jam, you're ONE DEAD PIZZA TOPPING! Once we sack ya, we'll use you to bring that pepperoni pal of yours to his KNEES! COWABUNGA!
(As Red is making his threats, Goombario’s eyes quickly dart over to the gate. He only rolls his eyes and shakes his head as he resumes digging in the ground.)
Red: *To the others* Check it, bros! He's too busy shaking in his li'l Goomba boots to even talk back! It's in the bag-
(Just then, the gate gives in and topples backwards with Red on it. He lands on Yellow, which causes him to accidentally fire his net launcher at the window of the house. When the window breaks, Goombario is shocked and Goompapa angrily exits the house.)
Goompapa: *As the camera zooms in on him* Dang-NABBIT! I just fixed that gate…
Black: Yeah… You're on your own with this one, Red… *Disappears with a smoke bomb*
Red: *Finally comes to his sense* Uh-oh… LET'S SPLIT, BROS!
(Red hightails it out of Goomba Village. Green tries to get Yellow up, but it is too late as Goompapa catches them.)
Goompapa: So, ya'll reckon you can get away with breakin' my gate, huh? Come to my village, mess with my gate… What do you have to say for yourselves?
Green: Uh-
Goompapa: Don’t you back-sass me!
***
(After several miles of running, Red is out of breath as he reaches the beginning of World 1-1 of the original Super Mario Bros. Red views his surroundings and finds Black meditating.)
Red: *Panting* Finally… I think… I lost that… old fart...
Black: *Notices Red* Oh, it’s you. You don’t look like you were beaten like a cheap drum, so I guess you ran away with your tail between your legs?
Red: OH! Oh that’s real nice, coming from Mr. Smoke Bomb! We’re a team, dude! You don’t just abandon your bros, bro! …Huh, I wonder if Green and Yellow are okay since I left them behind…
(Black rolls his eyes at that comment, while Green and Yellow enter the scene.)
Red: *Quickly turns around* Hey! Thought you dudes got merced* by that wacko chestnut!
(*Pronounced “murked”, variation of “to merc someone”)
Yellow: Surprisingly, no, we did not get “merced”. Though he did threaten to have his son shatter our shells if we didn’t compensate for his gate. So… we completely rebuilt his gate.
Red: What.
Yellow: Funny thing is, I noticed the design and structure were a little dated, so I suggested we build one with a more modern design in mind. But he wanted to go with the traditional one… These backwater Goombas have no appreciation for modern home design. If any part of me was hurt, it was my pride.
Red: Oh, cry me a river… What about you?
Green: Oh! Well, when we were fixing the gate, his wife came out with some lemonade and Goomnuts for all our hard work! Oh, and this little bag of money.
Red: Ugh! *slaps the money out of Green’s hands* We’re the Koopa Bros., not boy scouts! If you dorks are done playing with hick Goombas, then it’s time for our next plan!
(Green looks down in shame, while Black and Yellow roll their eyes.)
Red: Now, if we couldn’t even snatch that wimp by ourselves, what chance do we have against Mario’s other, better yes men? We’re gonna need a new plan, and I can’t be doing all the thinking on this one! I mean, it’s not like our next big idea is gonna smack us clean in the fa-
(As Red is talking, he turns around and starts walking in the opposite direction. He does not pay attention as he smacks into the giant Koopa, Kent C. Koopa.)
Kent C. Koopa: My, oh my! If it isn't my old sparring buddies from Koopa Village! Fancy meeting you here of all places! Yes, indeed!
Red: Kent C.! Small world, ain't it? Here for another one of your scams?
Kent C. Koopa: Why, yes I am, my friends! I found this lovely road to close off for a modest toll! I haven't found a path this perfect in a handful of years! Why, I even heard that the last time a certain plumber came treading on it was about twenty years or so, which means that it won't end as badly as my last tollbooth scheme!
Yellow: Actually, I'm somewhat doubting your sources, considering how Nintendo has a habit of exploiting nostalgia….
Red: *Snaps his fingers* WAIT A SEC! Ya wouldn't mind doing a favor, ya fat lug?
Kent C. Koopa: Well, well! For a friend like you, I'd give you the world! …. Of course, it's nothing personal, but I don't just give my help to anyone… Not without a little… *Wiggles fingers* Compensation, if you know what I mean.
(Red thinks about this for a little while, but after noticing that Green picked up all his coins, it finally clicks. To confirm this, he gives a sly grin to Green, who doesn't know what to make of it.)
***
(The scene changes to Pleasant Path. There is an obvious pitfall trap and the Koopa Bros. are partly seen in a nearby bush.)
Green: I get that you think I'm, like, totally braindead, Red. But even I can see this trap is totally wack!
Red: Then watch and learn, Braindead. Yellow has everything covered…
Yellow: If you're done patting me on the back, Red, we'd better be quiet until right about… *Waits a bit* Now!
(The four Koopa Bros. hide further in the bush. Parakarry is then seen flying across the path from the left. He suddenly stops to look at the obvious trap.)
Parakarry: *Chuckles* I reckon someone tried to trap me. Bet they forgot I can fl-
(Suddenly, a cage erupts from the ground and snags Parakarry.)
Parakarry: GWARSH! What the-!?
Red: *From offscreen* SCORE! Great work as usual, Einstein!
(The Koopa Bros. jump out and do their stylish introduction poses.)
Parakarry: Aw, dangnabbit! You fellers again! Can't y'all leave this ol' public servant alone?
Red: Funny you'd mention that since we ain't gonna do JACK SQUAT to ya. Let this flyboy out, Yellow.
(Yellow shrugs and presses a button on a remote that causes the cage to sink back into the ground.)
Black: Red, this is a bad idea. I was expecting you to only use that greedy punk in case he broke out.
Red: Nuh-uh! It's awesome! Besides, I already paid Kent and he wanted some payback!
Parakarry: Kent? As in Kent C.?
(Kent C. Koopa falls from the sky.)
Kent C. Koopa: The one and only, my friend! If I remember correctly, it was our mutual friend, Mario, who threw his monkey wrench into one of my favorite schemes. Since that unpleasant affair, I've been hard pressed to find a steady business proposition to fill my pocketbooks. Yes indeedly-so!
Parakarry: Welp, I could just get you a job over at the post office, if it's money troubles yer havin'.
Kent C. Koopa: As much as working for spare change sounds oh-so interesting, the amount of coins from snapping your pretty, little neck is far more than your ramshackle postal service ever makes in a year. Without a meddling plumber to save you, you can count on this being your last day alive, my friend… Any last words?
Green: Uh, dudes? Are we supposed to give him a Game Over?
Parakarry: The only game that’s over is this little game you’re playin’ right now!
(Parakarry reaches into his delivery bag and pulls out a Sleepy Sheep. He summons a flock of sheep to pass by Kent C. Koopa, which makes him drowsy. Parakarry then flips him over and knocks him into the river in the typical Koopa Shell fashion. Red is speechless at what he saw.)
Parakarry: Aw shucks, I was actually supposed to deliver that to somebody… I’ll have to say it was lost in the mail. As for you fellers… *he turns to the Koopa Bros.* Harassin' a postal worker is a kingdom offense...
Red: Ummm… Errrrr… RAISE SOME SHELL, BLACK!
Black: Fine! But this is the last time I'll save your sorry hide, dude!
(A fight scene breaks out between Parakarry and Black. I won't go into too much detail in this script since it's better to show it in the storyboard. Of course, there's a bit where Red is doing mock punches, like some characters do on the sidelines during more serious fight scenes.)
Green: *During the fighting* Uhhh… Why aren't we, like, gettin' a piece of that action, dudes?
Yellow: Dude, I’m still tired from fixing that gate. And… let’s be honest, Red isn’t going to do much better than Black.
Green: I guess you’re right. *starts eating a Goomnut while watching the fight* This could use some butter.
(The fighting continues until the point Black has Parakarry in a headlock. It looks like Black is about to win this fight.)
Red: YEAH! Let 'im have it, BLACK! Give 'im the o'l curb stomp! Slit his throat wide open! Post embarrassing pictures of 'im online!
Black: *Suddenly notices Red* RED! What the heck are you do-ACK! *Get tackled by Parakarry*
Red: *Panicking* Oh-crud-oh-crud-oh-crud-oh-crud-oh-crud… *Notices a rock nearby* Ah!
(With great effort, Red lifts the rock up to his chest and then tosses it. Unfortunately, it ends up knocking Black on the head. Parakarry lets go from his hold on Black.)
Parakarry: Whew! Tell ya what, fellers. Since I never had this much fun in a long time, I'll let this whole thing slide... This time.
(Parakarry flies off to resume his duties. I think he should drop a letter as a gag.)
Yellow: *noticing the dropped mail* Ooh, my magazine came in!
(After Black gets up from his back, he walks angrily away from the group.)
Red: Errr… Heh-heh… We'll get him next time, bro?
(Black quickly faces Red. He points to both his eyeballs with two fingers on his hand and then swiftly points them at Red. He then turns around to resume his walk. Green looks very concerned, while Yellow sternly glares at Red.)
Red: Aw, he'll come around. Anyway, let’s regroup.
***
(The scene cuts to the outside of the Koopa Bros. Fortress. There is a sign that reads "Help Wanted." The scene then cuts back to the bedroom of the Koopa Bros. where all furniture and possessions owned by Black are gone. Red is loafing on his bed, Yellow is at the table drumming his fingers, and Green is sitting on the floor bummed out about Black leaving.)
Green: Bill asked if he could take Black’s place.
Red: No! In the meantime, any of you dudes have any bright ideas?
Green: Red, do we, like, need to be a part of this whole evil shtick? We already got our shells handed to us as it is...
Red: *Is visibly annoyed* Any BRIGHT ideas from a SMART guy?
Yellow: Even though Green raises a good point, we’ve only attempted to capture two out of eight members of his party.
Red: *Gets out of bed* Hey! You’re right! We can’t give up now, we’re too cool for that! Especially me! And sometimes Green.
Green: Dude…
Yellow: Now there's the Red I know! *Gets out of his chair and starts pacing* Now, we can't go to Lavalava Island since my last boat prototype nearly cost me my right hand and neither of us can swim…
Green: I can totally swim!
Yellow: Across a mass of water like the ocean?
(Green looks sad for a moment.)
Yellow: Aw dude, don’t look so down, I know you’re trying to help. *under his breath* Unlike someone…
Red: I heard that! And stop babying him, Yellow! You gotta be tough on the little brothers, get them ready for the real world! Look, I already thought about the other places while you're ramblin' about swimmin' and something about a boat and your left hand-
Yellow: Right hand, actually.
Red: WHATEVER! As I was sayin', Koopa Village's out since it's not like they'll roll out the red carpet for us. And we’re not hitting Flower Fields, since we’d have to deal with Spike’s WACK JOB of a girlfriend.
Yellow: You mean the same girlfriend who threw a Spiny Egg at that dude who looked at Lakilester funny? She threw it so hard that they had to take him to a hospital to remove it? *Shivers*
Green: She did what? When did that happen?
Red: No one cares! Okay, so what about that ghost chick? Lady Ribbon or whatever?
Green: Lady Bow, dude. And that’s a negatory, we can't go to the Forever Forest.
Red: And why's that? You a Scaredy Rat?
Green: Uh, you’re the guy who can't even look at the entrance.
(Red shoots Green an annoyed look.)
Green: Just “toughening you up”, bro… Look, what I was tryin' to say is that the leafy dude, the one who stood outside the forest and knew all its secrets, he pulled a Houdini after something happened in Toad Town. It landed him in deep doo-doo. Dunno what it was, but I think it had somethin' to do with the bushes outside Bow's pad and how he, like, made Tayce T. cook a bunch of weird green cakes with that blue thing on top.
(Out of anger, Red lunges at Green and grabs him by the neck.)
Red: THERE YOU GO AGAIN MESSING UP A PERFECTLY GOOD PLAN, YA BUZZKILL!
Yellow: Red, be cool! That had nothing to do with Green! … Nothing the cops could prove, at least…
Green: *Franticly* WAIT-WAIT-WAIT! THERE'S WATT! WATT!
(Red lets go of Green out of confusion.)
Red: What?
Yellow: He means Watt as in the baby Lil' Sparky. If I remember correctly from the reports from General Guy, Mario saved her from a ghost who’d previously kidnapped her.
Red: Kidnapped, eh? *Grins and rubs hands together* This could be our big chance, bros! Forget taking candy from a baby! We’ll just take the whole darned baby instead!
Yellow: That sounded very… Questionable…
Red: *Puts his hand on Yellow's back* Ya worry too much, compadre! Once we meet this spook in the Toy Box, you'll feel much better about all this!
(Yellow still looks skeptical, but still walks with Red out of the room. Green picks himself up after his strangling and takes a deep breath as he slowly walks forward.)
***
(The scene cuts to the outside of the Big Lantern Ghost's room in Shy Guy's Toy Box. The scene cuts again to the inside of it, which is pitch black.)
???: Wee hee hee hee… Glad you could join me… In the dark…
Red: Okay… When I was hopin' to seal the deal, I didn’t think it’d be in some room where it’s so dark that I can’t even see my own dang hand!
(There is the sound of a light switch clicking as the lights in the room turn on. It is revealed that Red activated a comically large light switch and he is accompanied by Yellow and the Big Lantern Ghost.)
Big Lantern Ghost: Gah! I hate the light!
Yellow: Please understand that we need your help. After we finalize the details, you can spend at least another moment alone in the dark.
Big Lantern Ghost: Oh yes! How reasonable! Now then… Wee hee hee… What exactly are you proposing to me…?
Red: See, we heard you nabbed a certain brat, a few years ago. Think you can do it again, and also capture all the other chumps that worked for that plumber?
Big Lantern Ghost: Ah… When you mentioned a brat, did you mean the infant sparky? The one who was smooth and electrifying to the touch…? For a proposition, like this one… I will gladly do this without price… Of course, to effectively make the most of my services... I require just a handful of… favors…
(Yellow is a little skeptical when the Big Lantern Ghost was describing Watt, but Red only reacted when he mentioned that he'll do it for free.)
Red: FOR FREE!? Sounds radical, Sheetboy! Sure, a bit of manual labor sounds really drab, but I'm up for it as long as I get results!
Yellow: I don’t like where this is going… *is ignored*
Big Lantern Ghost: Wee hee hee… I am ever so glad you are willing to do this… Now then… My first request is that one of you deliver these supplies to the town's chef... Make sure that she cooks them all up into yummy treats…
(The Big Lantern Ghost shows the two Koopa Bros. a pile of multiple items. There are pitchers of Honey Syrup, Fire Flowers, Volt Shrooms, Lemons, Limes, Coconuts, and Jars of Jammin' Jelly. Of course, most of the pile consists of bags of Cake Mix. Yellow is a little uneasy by what he sees.)
Red: Mmm… Yo, can I have some of those munchies?
Big Lantern Ghost: Of course… I wanted those made to share with others… Now then… For my second task… I would like you… to take this paint… and give my van a fresh, new coat… I’m thinking… white. Only white, nothing else. Aw yeah…
(He hands Red and Yellow two cans of white paint and points to a life-sized toy truck. Red is visibly annoyed, while Yellow is sweating.)
Yellow: Uhh… *still ignored*
Big Lantern Ghost: Mm, that’ll be nice… Once you two are done with your chores… I’ll need you to help me get this truck outside the Toy Box. There’s a nice neighborhood outside the Toy Box, right?
Yellow: UHHH! *still ignored*
Red: Yeah, why?
Big Lantern Ghost: Good, good! This will allow my plan to be almost instantly set into motion… Wee hee hee hee…
Red: Whatever, Ghost Guy! As long as it's easy, foolproof, and most importantly, cool, then I'm up for any bit of this plan to catch the rest of those-
(Yellow couldn't stand it any longer and grabs Red by the collar to drag him out of the room.)
Yellow: NOPE! NO! No! No! NO! We're done here, Red!
Red: ACK! YELLOW! Be cool! It’s not every day a gig like this just falls into our laps!
Yellow: I SAID WE’RE DONE!
(It cuts outside where Yellow is still dragging a ranting Red. Green manages to catch up when he notices his two friends going in the opposite direction. He doesn't know what to make of it, but then he catches sight of the Big Lantern Ghost leaving his room.)
Big Lantern Ghost: Wait! Come back, my friends! We have so much to cover, and no one else was willing to help me with this task!
(Green is still confused by what is going on, but he suddenly notices a wanted poster on a nearby wall. After a careful look, it turns out that it is a wanted poster for the Big Lantern Ghost. Green looks at the Big Lantern Ghost and tilts his head in an awkward way.)
***
(The scene cuts back to the outside of the Koopa Bros. Fortress. Yellow is still dragging Red, but he suddenly drops him in front as he makes his way inside.)
Red: WHAT GIVES!? Don't tell me that green dork’s rubbin' off on ya!
Yellow: *Under his breath* Black really is right about his thickness… I need a break...
(Yellow opens the doors and they slam behind him. Red just stands there clueless for a bit, but he decides to follow him inside. The scene then cuts to the first corridor of the fortress with the cells and the upper block shifting puzzle. Red walking around looking for Yellow.)
Red: Yellow, ya there? Dunno what's got ya so cheesed, but it can't be my bad, right? *Pauses and starts getting worried* Right? *Sees Yellow tied up and gaged* Okay… I'll just let you get back to… Whatever this is… *Turns around and walks away* I knew that guy had a screw loose… *Suddenly stops and then makes a double take at Yellow* WAIT A SEC! WHO DID THIS TO YOU!?
Mario: *Says this when Red says "you"* Oh!
(Red frantically looks around for the source of the voice, but when he manages to look up, he is surprised to see Mario sitting up on the higher part of the corridor. He then jumps down to be at Red's level.)
Red: WAHH! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!?
Mario: *As he uses body language to simulate talking* Oh-ho.
Red: What? You were spying on me and my bros? This whole time?
Mario: *Continues using body language* Woohoo!
Red: Well I ain’t goin’ without a fight!
*Note: Mario actually hides in several parts of the scenes throughout this short.*
Mario: *Cracks his knuckles and nods* Mm-hmm…
Red: *Looks at the camera* Oh boy… I was kinda bluffing… Why do bad things always happen to good people! I didn’t do a dang thing today! … Not for lack of trying, anyway… NO NOT THE FACE!
*Credits*
(After the credits, Green enters the same corridor with a big bag of coins.)
Green: Guess what, dudes! I just snagged some weird ghost guy and got some serious coinage from his bounty! Not only is it enough to patch the fort up, but we can even grease Black's palms to...
(Green notices a brutally beaten Red, while Yellow is free from his bonds as he's nursing Red back to health.)
Green: Errrr… Heh, heh… Sorry, bros… Didn't know it was a bad time…
(Green walks backwards and closes the door behind him.)