Dex and the Chocolate

[DavidCaruso]

here's the chat log of what exactly happened, by the way

Spoiler

[71:55 PM] adam: adam/dex- ;D says:
*she said "awww thanks adam! " at the bus. then she got on the bus and i said happy valentines day and she smiled and waved as i walked away.

i kept it short so it wouldn't be awkward
*but all the way to the bus she flirted and we picked at each other and walked real close so who knows!!

basically i walked her to the bus and we flirted and shiz and then i told her i got her something and she kept asking me what it was and i finally pulled it out and said a valentines day gift and she smiled and said that and then she had to get on the bus so i said have a great weekend and she said you too! and waved

Dex and the Chocolate
An Adaptation by DavidCaruso (requested by Dex)

The day was February 12, and it was sunny outside. School had just ended, and Dex was walking to his bus with his crush, whose initials were HNR because Dex does not want the author of this story to give out his crush's real name, as he told me over MSN, because then Vipershark would find her and friend her on Facebook...and that would be bad.

Dex was walking HNR to the bus; in fact, HNR was on a leash, which Dex was holding. Dex and HNR flirted and did other various related 'shiz.' They also picked at each other and walked real close, which made Dex begin to get nervous and panic, because Dex felt uncomfortable when people walked close to him. It turns out that during Dex's childhood, a strange man walked close to him and offered him candy, then led him into a white van. That wasn't the best part of Dex's life, to say the least. But anyway, Dex finally decided to tell HNR that he had a surprise for her.

"I got you something, HNR!" Dex said happily.

"Oh, really?" HNR replied. "Does this mean I can finally be let off the leash?"

"NEVER!" Dex screamed, his face turning red and steam coming out of his ears. "But it is a Valentine's day gift." Then Dex pulled it out (if you know what I mean).

It was a stuffed animal and a box of chocolates. "Aww, thanks Adam! Colon right parentheses," she said, smiling and blushing (which Dex found cute). "That's so nice of you!"

"Aww, it's..." Dex tried to reply, but he couldn't. "You know what, let's just keep this short, this is getting awkward, oh my god I do not want this to be awkward, oh god oh god I did not just ruin this, oh god oh god aaaaahhh AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Oh, okay," HNR replied. "I have to get on my bus now, though, sorry...colon left parantheses."

"Aww..." Dex said sadly. "Have a great weekend!"

"You too! Colon D!" HNR replied, smiling and waving from the bus window.

Dex watched her bus as it drove away into the distance, until it was just a black speck on the horizon. After the bus turned around the corner, Dex walked home, skipping and singing to himself, even when he came across a bunch of black thugs wanting to rob him with guns.

"OH NO!" Dex said. "Black thugs?! Robbing me with guns?! What will I do?!"

"Well, whitey, you got any place more important to be?!" the lead black man said, in between eating a bucket of KFC.

"Oh, well, I kind of gave a Valentine's Day gift to this girl I like today, and I need to get home to talk to her on Facebook..." Dex replied slowly, mumbling.

"Oh man! That's great! Adorable!" a Mexican henchman to the black guy said. He was holding a lawnmower and mowing the school lawn.

"Go on, then. I don't want to interrupt you, man!" the black man said, pointing Dex on with his gun. Then Dex skipped and sang the rest of the way home.

When Dex got home, he immediately told everyone in MSN and Skype about his amazing adventures with HNR, and how he had butterflies in his stomach the entire time. The surgery to get the butterflies out of his stomach was scheduled for the next day. He had inhaled them while he was skipping, and an entire butterfly colony had formed in his stomach. They were flying around and laying even more eggs, causing more mini butterflies to form. The butterflies were infectious, which meant that Dex's bedroom had to be quarantined, and the National Institute of Health had sent doctors in to study this rare incident.

But all that doesn't matter, because Dex gave HNR her Valentine's Day gift, and she liked it.

Took him long enough.

THE END