I can't remember if I said this before, but:
JESUS. SHARPEN YOUR PENCIL. And maybe try drawing bigger. This looks fuzzy as hell.
Second: do not use eight lines when you can use one.
If your sketches are messy, fine , but your more finished stuff shouldn't have that scratchy look. If you're having issues with moving from a sketch to a finished piece, you need to draw lighter initially (or, transfer your sketch onto a clean page so you can rework detail).
Also let me teach you about shading.
You seem to be working more on form, which is good, but then as soon as you shade you're losing the feeling of 3d..ness because your markmaking is so flat.
This is kind of a poor example, but this might (might) illustrate what I mean:
Just... ignore the entire left side. APART FROM THERE, I've tried to make the marks follow the curve of the shapes they're on. I can see a little of this in your work, but there's a lot of areas where it looks like you stopped paying attention and went into autopilot. DON'T DO THAT. It's probably pretty obvious that's exactly what I did in the above image at a couple points, and it ruins the illusion of depth
Also, use some more pencils. Everything is a midtone with you, and that will not do. Your light areas aren't that far removed from your midtones, and I can't really see any particularly dark areas at all. Either work up more tone with more hatching, or use a softer pencil. Or both. Softer pencils aren't usually very well suited to hatching because they smudge, so keep that in mind.
Also don't thicken the lines, just build up more tone. Also put in some more highlights. Like I said: less midtone. Seriously.
JESUS. SHARPEN YOUR PENCIL. And maybe try drawing bigger. This looks fuzzy as hell.
Second: do not use eight lines when you can use one.
If your sketches are messy, fine , but your more finished stuff shouldn't have that scratchy look. If you're having issues with moving from a sketch to a finished piece, you need to draw lighter initially (or, transfer your sketch onto a clean page so you can rework detail).
Also let me teach you about shading.
You seem to be working more on form, which is good, but then as soon as you shade you're losing the feeling of 3d..ness because your markmaking is so flat.
This is kind of a poor example, but this might (might) illustrate what I mean:
Just... ignore the entire left side. APART FROM THERE, I've tried to make the marks follow the curve of the shapes they're on. I can see a little of this in your work, but there's a lot of areas where it looks like you stopped paying attention and went into autopilot. DON'T DO THAT. It's probably pretty obvious that's exactly what I did in the above image at a couple points, and it ruins the illusion of depth
Also, use some more pencils. Everything is a midtone with you, and that will not do. Your light areas aren't that far removed from your midtones, and I can't really see any particularly dark areas at all. Either work up more tone with more hatching, or use a softer pencil. Or both. Softer pencils aren't usually very well suited to hatching because they smudge, so keep that in mind.
Also don't thicken the lines, just build up more tone. Also put in some more highlights. Like I said: less midtone. Seriously.