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Story: A Squires Ambition. [Writing]
#4
General error:
You don't write the sound effects in a story.
It's not a comic book nor a comic book script.
They aren't proper words.
No matter if it's "grr" or "yaaargh" or any noises like those.

There's also a handful of grammar errors, mainly in proper punctuation.
The ellipses is unnecessary and you skipped some commas ("Hold your tongue cur!").
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Messages In This Thread
RE: Story: A Squires Ambition. [Writing] - by Proton - 07-16-2011, 12:30 AM

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