Story: A Squires Ambition. [Writing]

[phlashblazer]

General error:
You don't write the sound effects in a story.
It's not a comic book nor a comic book script.
They aren't proper words.
No matter if it's "grr" or "yaaargh" or any noises like those.

There's also a handful of grammar errors, mainly in proper punctuation.
The ellipses is unnecessary and you skipped some commas ("Hold your tongue cur!").

Ah, well you wouldn't mind sending me a re-write would you?