Help Wanted: Apples Within

[Shade]

That's looking pretty good. I definitely prefer the one on the right, props for spotting issues and making changes.

One of the main things worth noting is that your colors are very, very saturated. I'd suggest toning those down a tad, especially the shades. Everything seems way too bright currently. Your line art is also a bit jaggy in places.

You definitely seem to be improving though. Keep it up!