Phrases, sayings and quotes.

[TimeToPerish]

Let's make this a thread, post Phrases, sayings or quotes that you like.
It can be funny, serious or anything.

Mine:
"You can't have everything....where would you put it?"

"When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane."

"An optimist is someone who falls off the Empire State Building, and after 50 floors says, 'So far so good!'"

E:

"I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure..."

[LeleleleMAXIMUM]

This one's funny:
"Sobrang taba ng nanay mo, nagiging magalang ang kaniyang mga hita: 'mauna ka na!', 'hindi, mauna ka na!' "

[Nystre]

This one's funny:
"Sobrang taba ng nanay mo, nagiging magalang ang kaniyang mga hita: 'mauna ka na!', 'hindi, mauna ka na!' "

idgi is it a sex joke

[LeleleleMAXIMUM]

shut up translators won't save you now

[Boo]

"If you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all."

[Gollum]

"Stop posting"

[Saltonara]

Let's make this a thread, post Phrases, sayings or quotes that you like.
It can be funny, serious or anything.

Mine:
"You can't have everything....where would you put it?"

"When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane."

"An optimist is someone who falls off the Empire State Building, and after 50 floors says, 'So far so good!'"

E:

"I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure..."

I've always loved this quote. It's so gay that it's funny.

[Stooben]

And now it's time for George Carlin to come in and kick this topic's ass.

Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

Have you ever noticed that their stuff is shit and your shit is stuff?

The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, “You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.”

Religion has convinced people that there’s an invisible man…living in the sky, who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn’t want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer and burn and scream until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you and he needs money.

Just a fraction of this man's awesome quotes.

[Nystre]

shut up translators won't save you now

what kind of distinguished gentleman do you take me for

[Rökkan]

And now it's time for George Carlin to come in and kick this topic's ass.

Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

Have you ever noticed that their stuff is shit and your shit is stuff?

The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, “You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.”

Religion has convinced people that there’s an invisible man…living in the sky, who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn’t want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer and burn and scream until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you and he needs money.

Just a fraction of this man's awesome quotes.

what is this man and where can I find more stuff of him

[Joseph Styling]

"You fuck with me, I bring the pain, little boy. I don't give a shit if the thread lasts for decades. You don't fuck with me. Let me just make that clear."
some guy in a board i frequent

[Woppet*]

We work jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need.

[Ekoi]

"THIN YOUR PAINTS!"

"CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!"

[LeleleleMAXIMUM]

And now it's time for George Carlin to come in and kick this topic's ass.

Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

Have you ever noticed that their stuff is shit and your shit is stuff?

The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, “You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.”

Religion has convinced people that there’s an invisible man…living in the sky, who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn’t want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer and burn and scream until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you and he needs money.

Just a fraction of this man's awesome quotes.

what is this man and where can I find more stuff of him

i kind of hate you, but it's okay

[Stooben]

what is this man and where can I find more stuff of him

Here's a good portion of his best quotes.

The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.

I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.